Thursday, July 26, 2007

End

The story should conclude here. Or should I say, it’s just a chapter?

They said that parting has always been such sweet sorrow, I don’t exactly recall if it was. I remember saying in one entry here before that I am to end talking to you here. But our paths still cross and I still have feelings for you.

I think I still do hold that thought. I will never take the credit off you on the times I almost gave up and that you’re the first person I think of running to. Or when I am happy, I’d like to share my joys with you. Togetherness and rejection seemed to be long-lost twins that I seemed to reconnect every time I remember you now.

You’ll be one of those men that will haunt me. Take the credit, I considered you a ‘man’.

So, this is it. When they said that don’t say goodbye, I am not saying it to you. As much as I wanted to, I’m sure we are still to see each other, and avoiding you will just hurt me more and haunt me more. Let’s just say I am ending me foolishness on you. Kill the hopes that you will like me the way I like you. Care for me as much I am concern and cares for you. My idiocy had to stop. For my sake.

I’ll see you around. Most likely every Tuesday or whatever day we will go visit and present in your office. We’ll still greet each other, give each other’s a peck on the cheek for “hellos” and “goodbyes”. I might be less to join your group’s get-together or the planned outings. I will miss Anne and Tina. I will miss you too, of course but this has to end.

Thank you, “Yan-Yan”.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Affected

I have postponed entering this event that really is bothering me again. Do you really have such ideology or habit to make ladies jealous by inviting and flirting to another lady and worst when they are friends?

If you have forgotten that I was sitting at the back seat and then you flirt with Stephanie.

Wow.

Then you tell me I’m “masungit”.

If we are not that desperate that night to get out of that mall, I wouldn’t suggest to Stephanie to contact you and ask for that favor to fetch us.

We should really stay FAR apart. You really felt you are different ever since you got your own car, you got your own place and you don’t talk to me anymore unless nobody’s talking to you in the office. You only remember me when you need something.

I am always the last resort.

It really hurts me so bad.

Wednesday, July 4, 2007

Upset

I can’t think straight.

Yes. Until now, I thought I am to stop blogging here. I thought not being “concern” about you and avoiding you would help me move on.

I thought I’m ok now… that I’m over you.

Until you are in that company and that company is our client, our paths will surely cross.

Why would you announce to the world that you’re to bring Stephanie home. Half the world know that I like you. I was there. And with that squinted eyes, I feel and I know you are checking my reaction.

Are you intentionally annoying me? Making me jealous? Because for all it’s worth… I am.

Then I later found out, you asked her out for the Transformers movie.

I am affected.

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Exhaling...

I had to drop off a mock up for one company in your office this morning. I decided to make it earlier to really avoid you. Unfortunately, you were early too. You caught me by the guard.

As always, you ask what am I doing there with a morning greeting and the peck on the cheek. The usual greeting.

Or was it your usual "'Musta?" (How are you?)

I'm not sure... I was lost the moment you entered the gate...

No word, no SMS or even YM from you and with my pledge of not to have any personal business with you for almost 2 weeks now... and this happens.

Undeniably, my heart still bleeds...

Ouch.